YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
