If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
