i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Randomize
