i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
he just fucked me for my cheese..
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
