I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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