I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
