I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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