the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
