we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
