the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
