Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
