I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
