I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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