Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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