I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
