Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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