dude i'm inner monologue high
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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