If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize