i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
