$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Randomize
