I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
