I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
you never un-have a 4some
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