bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
