My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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