ugly people sure do ruin things
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
whose parrot is this?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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