I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize