Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
