Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
