Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
It's just like the Real World with babies
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Less talking, more tequila
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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