I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
it glows. i had to have it.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
