Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
