Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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