I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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