Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
