He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
