Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
