What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
