More tranny stories later!
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
