I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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