Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
