No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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