Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
