he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
