Do you still have your period?
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
