Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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