Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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