i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
