i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
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