Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize