Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
